I think that I have mentioned it before, we live in this modern day world full of choice and technology and I am starting realise (or maybe I have known for a long time) that this doesn't really do any favours to those of us that are trying to date. To me, this is modern dating...
Modern Dating is... never knowing what the fuck is actually going on and being to scared to ask because you don't want to come across as crazy
Modern Dating is... sitting on "Read" and going silently crazy wondering what you did to upset him
Modern Dating is... joining Tinder even though you think its probably not going to work but feeling desperate enough to give it a go anyway because your time is running out.
Modern Dating is... Deleting Tinder a week after you installed it because its not organic and everyone you have met isn't actually 6 ft even when they said they would
Modern Dating is... Reinstalling Tinder a few months later because hey, this time could be different and you're not getting any younger
Modern Dating is... saying no to all other guys because you have feelings for someone and while nothing has happened, you just don't want to risk it in case it does. And this is why, you are currently in the longest drought of your sexual career
Modern Dating is... buying new lingerie, getting a wax and a fake tan and laying yourself on a silver platter only to be turned down. But hey, you look banging so really he is the only one that misses out and sharing a bed is annoying anyway.
Modern Dating is... getting waxed every month because it might be lucky this time around and even though it never is, at least someone is touching your vagina, even if it is only to slather you in hot wax
Modern Dating is... having multiple platforms to contact people on and still not getting anything (because he hates you!!) and wanting to contact them but not wanting to seem crazy
Modern Dating is...trying not to be crazy but then being crazy about not being crazy. And actually legit not being crazy until that dude comes on the scene
Modern Dating is...bomb fire Nudes that you send only to them and forget to save. Its kinda like that scene in Big Daddy "we wasted the good surprise on you". Though thankfully you did save that one amazing underboob shot and now its on Tumblr because hey, sometimes things are just too good to not share
Modern Dating is... making an effort with your head, just in case there is a chance that you might see them. Even if the Chance is like 0.01%. You can't hide your terrible personality but you can kind of try to hide your terrible face.
Modern Dating is...'not looking for anything', and I kind of get that. If you've managed to get to this age without any battle wounds, I don't know that you have really experienced life. But I also think that you cant put your life on hold for ever just out of fear, not every person is them and you deserve to be happy... you just need to try.
Modern Dating is... finding out from social media that its over and you're done. No final show downs, just some ghosting and photos with the new partner.
Modern Dating is... constantly wondering why you aren't good enough and why it is so easy for everyone else that you know to find partners or get affection. You know you're hideous, but fuck, you're not that bad and you're sure you've got some good qualities in there.
Modern Dating is... having to tell your friends that its another false alarm and they can take the eggs out of the basket now. Or actually not really telling anyone at all, because really there was never anything to tell.
This last couple of months, I have felt pretty much all of these things. Same old story, met a guy, he took my breath away the instant that I saw him without him even realising (I strongly believe that he is one of the special ones) A couple of months of talking and terrible flirting on my behalf and it all came to a head a few weeks ago. I laid my cards on the table and it didn't turn out how I was wanting, but that's cool as well, he isn't looking for anything and I respect him so much for being honest about it. I got sent this the other day and it hit my feels "Even if you go for it and it doesn't work out you still win. You still had the guts enough to head straight in to something that frightened you. That type of bravery will take you places" and you know what, that is 100% correct. I've survived every other set back in life and with each one of these, its taking me closer to the magic that I deserve. How bloody exciting is that.
So hold in there my cherubs, its not easy, but I KNOW that one day its all going to be worth it.
Love and Magic Dreaming