Friday, 22 July 2016

So he hasnt messaged you back?

I would like to curse modern technology, it has come in to this world and while it makes things easier it also makes some things a lot harder and a lot more confusing. Like Dating, that's one thing that has been fucked up by modern technology. We now live in a society of instant gratification and if we don't hear back from our significant other or latest crush with in the hour, pretty much the sky is falling and all hell is breaking loose. Don't worry girls, you are not alone in your insecurity and all girls have been there at least once while waiting to hear back... and in this time we let our imaginations run wild as to what is actually going on. Here are some reasons that we come up with as to why he hasn't texted back 

The Reasons you give yourself on to why he hasn't texted Back
(Because your world is about to end, you think of all the little minor details of things that you could have possibly done wrong and that's the reason that you haven't heard from him. You are the Reason, you are always the reason. WHY CANT YOU STOP BEING THE REASON!!!!!)

  • You accidentally farted while you were out with him and while it was super quiet and discreet, he totally heard and now he hates you 
  • He has finally realised that you are not a size 8 Playboy model and he hates you 
  • He thinks you are too clingy and he hates you 
  • You are too tall and your hands are too large and he has just realised this and he hates you 
  • You remember that time you went out and put on a rushed face so your left wing wasn't as good as your right wing and he noticed and he doesn't want no girl that has misshapen eyes... and he hates you 
  • He is too busy texting the 50 other girls he knows because he hates you 
  • You like your steak Medium well and he likes his Steak Rare, it was never going to work and he hates you
  • He figured out that one time many years ago you made out with one of his friends and now he hates you 
  • He likes girls with Dark Hair and you have blonde hair and now he hates you 
  • He remembers the time you accidentally squirted lemon in his eye while you were eating Pho and he doesn't want to hang out with someone that is so clumsy and he hates you 
  • Maybe he died.... from hating you 
  • He hates you

The Reason You Best Friend Gives you on why he hasn't texted you back 
(because of course she is being kept up to date with the situation and counting the minutes with you since you heard from him last. Its her job to try and cushion the blow and keep you calm and possibly even giving you false hope and mostly you love her for it)
  • He really likes you but he is overwhelmed and doesn't know how to deal with it
  • Guys are shit 
  • You haven't done anything wrong, he is just busy. 
  • Maybe he lost his phone
  • he is probably just sleeping 
  • Maybe he hates you (disclaimer: they never say this, but maybe they should)

The Actual Reason he Hasn't Texted You Back
(Because he actually might have a reason, and all this hate is probably unwarranted. Boys and Girls are different creatures remember. And maybe they just don't realise that they are being perceived to be playing games. Silly Boys) 
  • He thinks "She didn't ask me a question in that message so I don't need to reply to it" 
  • He simply has nothing else he needs to say
  • He isn't interested but doesn't know how to let you down gently
  • He forgot (heck, we are all guilty of this one, you think that you reply and then you open your inbox and bam, a message from your mum from three days ago is sitting in there waiting for a reply) 
  • He is sleeping 
  • He hates you

So guys, if you are reading this, just put her out of her misery and throw her a text. Even if it is just to say "Oi Slut, fuck off, I am not interested and Yes I am seeing other girls. Bye Felicia", girls appreciate honesty and mostly they weren't crazy until you came along with your penis voodoo magic. And Girls... this is a two way street, you know how crazy it makes you, so do on to others, as you wish to be done on to you. Simple.

Love and Lateness 

Miss K 

P.S Thanks to all the amazing girls that gave me input in this one, its nice to know that I am not alone on the crazy shelf. I say we go back to hand written, posted love notes, less anxiety for sure and then we can have another reason for hating Australia Post when the letter never comes.

No comments:

Post a Comment